Thanksgiving Movie Marathon

December 4, 2008 · 4 comments 

First post from an airplane, wahoo! I had a chance to catch up on some movies over the Thanksgiving holiday. Sadly, most of the movies weren’t nearly as good as I wanted them to be. I had about nine that I was considering, but only watched six of them. The three I didn’t get around to watching were Killer Movie, Joyride 2, and Home Movie. I think I definitely should have watched Home Movie.

The strange thing all the movies I watched had in common were that I didn’t really know much about any of them, but I had watched the trailer for each at least once at some point. So, I ended up watching (trailer links:) Splinter, Midnight Meat Train, Dance of the Dead, The Night Flier, Fear(s) of the Dark, and Trailer Park of Terror (not in that exact order.) If I would have bet myself which ones I would end up liking, I would have picked MMT, DOTD, and FOTD. But, I would have lost the bet. “Oh, really?” you say? Yeah. Really.

For some reason, I thought the scope of Splinter was going to be slightly larger, in the vein of something like Slither (idk.) The total cast list comprises of like, 7, and the majority of the story takes place in the gas station seen in the trailer. Splinter was the only movie I didn’t completely love, but it wasn’t bad enough to give a bad review. It was actually pretty clever for such a small cast in a small location with a high-ish concept. The acting wasn’t terrible, but Splinter isn’t nearly as effective as Cookers. I will admit, though, that I now have a faux crush on Jill Wagner. What a lame dvd cover, btw.

Somehow, I found FearNet OnDemand (which I couldn’t find again later(?)), and got to watch Midnight Meat Train for free. I was probably the most aggravated by this one, because it’s one of those “it had such potential” films, yet totally dropped the ball. The only really good thing I can say about it was how good the cinematography was. It seemed like every scene was very picture-esque. If you’re someone who can let logic and rationale fly out the window while watching a movie, you might actually like this one. But if not, things start falling apart left and right, and it gets really distracting. The gore was decent for the most part, but alot of the CG looked bad and I don’t understand how half of it can look good and the other half totally suck. I’ve been a fan of Leslie Bibb since the show “Popular”, and if Trick r’ Treat ever gets released, she’s in that too <3<3<3. Bradley Cooper also seems like one to keep an eye on, especially with his role in “He’s just not that into you.”

I was most looking forward to Dance of the Dead, and it seemed like it would stand out from the rest of the crap that Ghosthouse Underground released. At one point, I turned to my friend and wrapped up the entire film with “it’s like a low budget R-Rated disney movie for teens.” Alot of cliche characters saying alot of cliche lines while killing zombies in ridiculous ways (bodyslamming, and beating them with ripped off limbs, etc.) It wouldn’t have been so bad if it didn’t look like they filmed the entire movie with a camera that could be checked out of a high school videography class.

What I wasn’t very surprised with was The Night Flier. A low grade King adaptation that makes me wonder what King was smokin when he wrote it. That’s all I really to say about to movie. A couple of memorable shots, that’s about it.

The biggest letdown, sadly, was Fear(s) of the Dark. What a terrible movie for such a fantastic trailer. It’s screening at some festival somewhere, the interwebs are buzzing about it because of the trailer, it shows up on AMC’s Horror Ranking List, or whatever. It’s even subtitled, so it already seems like a solid pick to watch. Watching the film, however, was like watching one of those old PBS animated movies, where nothing really happens, ever, barely any dialogue, and I found myself nodding off constantly. The last story of the anthology *might* be worth watching, but not worth sitting through the entire movie to see. If I had a top ten list of movies I wish I could the time back from watching, this would be on it.

Finally, the very last movie I got around to watching, was the one I expected the least from. I wasn’t really impressed (at all) with the trailer for Trailer Park of Terror, but dammit if it didn’t grow on me as I watched it. In fact, watching the trailer again, it doesnt even seem like the same movie. The production quality is above average compared to most DTV crap that gets shoveled out. This one was actually good enough that I’m going to do a formal review on later. If I had to describe it by comparing it to other movies, I would have to say something like Night of the Demons + Texas Chainsaw Massacre + Evil Dead + House of 1,000 Corpses. It’s based on a comic and the soundtrack is awesome, it’s almost like a musical in the vein of Dead & Breakfast, but enough restraint to keep the baddies from doing Thriller like dancing.

So, my apologies for not posting more quality reviews or studies lately, but it’s really hard to find good/new horror to write about, to keep things even, so I’m not writing about all the other older horror movies I’ve seen a million times, cause it’s not as motivating as writing about something fresh

4 Responses to “Thanksgiving Movie Marathon”

1. Horror Movies Says:
   January 19th, 2009 at 10:36 am

   Thats a good list of movies there, I have just finished watching living dead whcih is amazing! I suggest you watch that next

   Thanks.

2. Jane Says:
   April 6th, 2009 at 2:08 pm

   Are you crazy?! Dance of the Dead rocked!

   I loved the characters! “I don’t know how to shoot a machete”! Classic line!

   I think the movie was actually shot on film, too. You must just have a cheap TV.

3. Wes Fierce Says:
   April 6th, 2009 at 3:40 pm

   I can see the novelty, I just didnt appreciate it and I watched it on a 60 inch HD sony bravia, but whatever.

4. Skywalker Says:
   June 7th, 2009 at 5:14 am

   My favorite movie last year was DANCE OF THE DEAD! I love the Coach!!! Yes, it did have archetypes, but definitely not cliches!

   The movie looked great to me too!.. maybe you need to fix your settings on your TV?

   I heard Sam Raimi hand-picked it for distribution under his Ghost House label. Here’s a more accurate review of the movie:
   http://www.bloody-disgusting.com/film/2035/review